Lovely

It just keeps going and going and going...

"Hold me Bat Boy, touch me Bat Boy"

Oh yes, those are actual lyrics. Welcome to "Bat Boy: The Musical". It just doesn't get much better then that...

Anyway, long long long day at school with a 6 hour break. Well, I only had a 5 hour and 15 minute break. So THERE! Riiight. I got a lot of things done though. Including another invigorating workout. Thank you Daneel for the butt comment. It made my morning. Love you! Spent the rest of day bored as hell, but I actually did get some work done. Ah, I forgot. Lets backtrack. Hmm this weekend was interesting. I have decided that I am way to tired for my own good. Its horrible when I drink half of what will normally get me to pass out, and yet I still do. With a lovely ending to that night alright...ugg. Lets say that sunday I was a literal invalid. Yikes. Should have just stayed home. No more drinking for this alcoholic...

I'm wondering if I have become invisible again. I want to be where I am right now, but am I just lieing to myself that I'm decently progressing? I think so. I'm pretty sure that I'm caught up in one big fairytale world. With all the talent that surrounds me, how in the lords name do I actually succeed? There is no bloody way. Why can't there be a big posted sheet that lists every teacher I know and a list of their favorites in the program? So at least then I'm not guessing at where I place in the bottom ranks. I'd then at least have some proof to go on. I'm so frustrated with not being able to dance, of being stuck back in the shadows and of being unable to embrace myself again. I'm lost within my inner maze of me wondering, well I think Bruce Willis said it best: "Wheres the fucking door?"

posted by Leah Wilburn @ 10:16 PM